Sunday, April 18, 2010

Wind in My Hair

Life is a roller coaster! Which is good, because I love roller-coasters! Not the new-fangled loop-the-loop numbers mind you. Nope, I love the old-school, rickety, wooden ones. I love the click-click-clack-click sound they make as you are being hauled to the top. I love the wind as it zips through my hair and the stomach lurching drop of that first descent. I love the wobble at the curves. I remember once I went to King's Dominion in Virginia with some friends. They've got some awesome wooden roller-coasters we rode over and over and over again. That night, while I lay in bed with my eyes closed, I re-lived every screaming twist and turn. I'm pretty sure I fell asleep with a smile on my face and the feel of the wind in my hair.

So is a roller coaster. The past few months have certainly been illustrative of that. We've had all sorts of multi-generational major surgeries in our family that have forced us to face fear in the face and let go and trust God. We've lost my husband's feisty, life-loving, big-hearted, incredibly supportive mother. We've moved a daughter into her college dorm, traveled every other week since January, and moved furniture (and 2 pianos) all over the West. And I finished out my first semester as a full-time college student - with straight A's.

I'm definitely feeling the wind in my hair!

I confess it's gotten to be a bit taxing. Okay, let's just say I fully embraced "whoa is me" for a minute or two. It's been hard. I allowed myself to feel bone tired and soul-weary. I keep saying I'm looking forward to "normal." But every time I do, there's this little voice in my head that whispers, "This is normal." So, if this is "normal" then I better sit back and enjoy the ride! Because, I'm just going to keep on riding it over and over again.

So, I've got a few goals I wanted to throw out to the world. I figure if I scream it
from the top of the ride I'll hear it screaming back at me in the whistling wind of my next descent.

I am going to appreciate the click-click-clack sound of change. I am going to
thrill with the view from the top and embrace the stomach dropping thrills of the descent. I am going to scream - not with fear - but with the pure exhilaration of life. I am going to run to the front of the line to keep on riding the ride. And when I close my eyes at night and re-live every twist and turn I am going to fall asleep with a smile on my face as I remember the feel of the wind in my hair.


  1. ya know, you can't write one paragraph without it being powerful and fun to read! =) i love hearing you write and tell stories and hear your contemplations on life. i like how you said that it is normal to always be on a roller coaster in life! so true, so true! i've been trying to enjoy the today and stop hoping for a better tomorrow. thanks for reaffirming my new goal! =)

  2. Yaya you finally updated!!! That's a really good plan- to start thinking of change as normal. I should start doing it too! I think it'd definitely help me enjoy the ride more. I really like your blog mom! Sometimes I forget what an incredible writer you are!

  3. Well said. I am also happy you updated!!!! Keep posting because like these lovely ladies said, you write beautifully and express my thoughts and feelings into words!

    Yea for change. Normal is boring, change if fun. So are pianos, moved across the west. :) xoxo

  4. I thought this perfect considering our little chat last night. You really are a wonderful writer. Come see Avatar with me again.

  5. I love you!! Thanks for the inspiration! I needed it!

  6. Yay Mom posted! I fully came to check your blog with the intent of pestering you since you pestered me, but alas. YAY STRAIGHT A'S!!! You rock....and roll? Ha ha I couldn't resist a Dad-style joke. Love you!

    P.S. Another goal should be to post at least as often as I do-that's not much. ;)

  7. Taralyn - I have complied....

    Tag - you're it!!!!